This funny feeling...

I dyed my hair to its natural colour...and it feels good to look like how I was intended to look. For now. I like to change my hair a lot, and I think it's because it's something I feel that I can control in my life, when things aren't so great. But right now? I think things are pretty great.

I'll tell you why...

I'm home, where my family and friends are (and pets!). I'm getting my shit together. ANNNND... I have somebody who really knows me (who has known me for a good six or seven years) and who makes me laugh instead of cry- I'm not gonna go into detail quite yet, because I'm not ready to disclose that information. But I've definately got this funny feeling all up in my tummy, and I think it's happiness and uhh, something a little bit more than that.

I'm myself again. I'm this weird, awkward, doesn't-give-a-shit-what-people-think about me girl. And I'm starting to actually like myself, because the past three years I haven't been me, I've been this shell of a girl who just hates herself, who has to walk on eggshells just breathing! Not anymore.

Read my books, blah, blah, blah...and stuff, yeah!

I'm going to go eat Fruit Loops now, suckers!!!

Books you need to read on Wattpad and updates on stuffs

Hey people out there! So, in my free time, as you know, I read a lot. Like, a lot. IT'S AN ADDICTION OKAY? And I've come across some really good stories on Wattpad. Here're some stories which should really be checked out:

Blind Attraction- by Cora Virgo

The Dark Place- by deejaybee

12 Weeks 12 Dates- by bookbuddy

Skittles and Science- by EternalZephyr

Just Jack- by SeanPowell

Love Like a Delinquent- by 3mmaRawrs

***
So, I've been slowly updating my stories. My word counts are all really awesomely huge, and I'm proud of how much I've written- especially for Dark One. I'll update on Wattpad eventually, but for now it'll still be slow. Sorry guys! Also, my novella is on sale at Amazon.ca for 99 cents...so check it out? Please?

New story, new facebook page!

I have a couple of new stories up, but the one I'm really working on is Grit. I'm not too sure where it's going to take me, but know this: it's a post-apocalyptic-dystopian-werewolf story...so that should be interesting, no? The main character, Micah, looks a lot like my friend Deborah, so I ended up using her face as part of the cover. I think it turned out well :)

I have a like page on facebook!!! Sydnie Beaupré :D yaaaay!!! Hit like if you like my stories?!? Please!!!

Stuff happens

So, I broke up with my boyfriend. I feel like it was the right thing to do, because I was unhappy. We fought a lot, and every time we tried to fix the relationship- well it wasn't done the right way. I fell out of love with him. That's not to say that I don't still love him, because yeah, I do. But I'm not in love with him anymore. I also couldn't stay in Sherbrooke anymore, it was lonely, I have no friends up there, and am pretty awkward. My french is bad, and Sherbrooke is mostly French. I missed my friends and family- everything wasn't working.

So, I'm back in Montreal.

Stuff happens.

I'll be okay and I hope he will too. I have great family and friends, and he does too so I think he'll be okay eventually.

A day to remember

Today is a kind of mixed emotion day for my family. 12 years ago exactly, my Papa (grandfather, for people who think I mean my dad) died because of colon cancer. They discovered it too late, and there was nothing much the hospital could do.

My Papa was a great man. Born in Derbyshire England, in 1932, on November 20th. Died in Montreal, Quebec, Canada, in 2001, on February 13th.

He spoke many different languages, and was a very well educated man; he was a school teacher, actually. He married twice, and had five children, two with his first wife, Irene Ferguson (my Grandma) Martine (my Mummy) and Alan, and three with his second wife, Irene Mackie (my Nana), Andrew, Fiona, and Peter.

When he was alive, he had three grandchildren- Rebecca, Jason from my aunty Fiona, and me, from my Mummy (Martine). Shortly after his death, my cousin Amber was born (from my uncle Peter).

In 2012, Rebecca had a son named Kaleb, and he is loved by us all.

I think he'd be proud of us all. We have all overcome so much in our lives, because believe me when I tell you my family hasn't had it easy. But we're all pulling through, and we're all happy with our lives, because we have each other and good friends.

I miss my Papa, we all miss him. His jokes, his laugh, his garden, his love of poetry...all of it. He's still with us thiugh, I think. No, I know. He loves Amber and Kaleb just as much as if they were alive when he was.

Word Count

Word count

 

(Story started December 30^th 2010, 400 words approx.)

 

                      12998 so far as of November 12^th 2011

                                                                                      } 8268 words later

                      21266 so far as of September 17^th 2012

                                                                                      } 3393 words later

                      24659 so far as of February 8^th 2013

S'been a while

So, I haven't blogged (not that anybody notices, since all my followers are my friends...) in a while, because I've been under a lot of stress. That stupid math exemption request is taking up a lot of time, and my boyfriend Liam and I have been fighting like cats and dogs over everything- I almost moved out yesterday because I miss all of my family and friends in Montréal and I can't stand it here anymore because it's messy and we fight- well for lots of reasons, but one of them almost made us break up. We haven't broken up, thank God, and I haven't moved out.

See, I was sitting on the couch and Liam was making dinner, and I just...snapped. I realized that I'm just unhappy here, and can't stay here anymore. So, out of nowhere, I said it. I just said, "I don't want to live here anymore," it was verbal vomit...I just couldn't stay here anymore. I didn't even discuss it with him before making the descision. So, he got angry and ignored me, I called my parents and his mum...and stuff happened. Then, before I knew it he was in the room, telling me that he was sorry for how he treated me (he's kind of an ass without knowing it...and also when he knows it sometimes) and for how everything has turned out. He was sorry for EVERYTHING. He cried. I cried. It was a snot/sob-fest. BUT we talked after that and decided that we should at least try to work things out before me giving up on us after four years.

So we're going to try to fix things. I'm no angel in the relationship department either, don't get me wrong. I need to work on my sarcasm (he has aspergers and doesn't understand it) and I also need to work on my depression and quick temper (I uswed to be passive aggressive, but that's gone now into an explosion of anger)...we both have to support the other. If it doesn't work out, that sucks. But we owe ourselves to at least try. We've been together four years right?

There's all that, and the fact that I do absolutely nothing all day half the time due to depression or me being sick. I need a job, but my french isn't up to par for Sherbrooke. I'm not in school since I only had one semester to get my GED, and failed again.

First world problems, right? Ugh. They still suck. But, expect more posts.